The best way to serve someone else is to love yourself

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These are the EXACT principles I used to go from rushing to put on lipstick at a stoplight, scarfing down Cheetos & Nutter Butters on my lunch break, and replying "uh huh yea I hear you" while looking down on my iPhone to saying no without feeling guilty, yes to being a priority and not giving a damn if anyone has a problem with it.

Why Wearing A Bikini At Thirty Gave Me Liberty

Even though I never thought it was an issue.

Dad: “No, Melodee. You can’t wear a bikini to that pool party.”

Me: “Come on. Everyone at the party is wearing one…”

**tip toes over to the other more understanding parent**

Me: “Mom, can you try and convince Dad to let me wear a bikini?”

Mom: “No, Melodee. Wearing a bikini is like wearing a bra and underwear. Would you wear that out in public?”

Hmm… good point and it made sense to my logical brain at the time.

No, I wouldn’t wear a bra and underwear out in public, so why would I wear a bikini? Well played, Mom. Well played.

For years after becoming an adult, I’d always choose to wear a full piece swimsuit (not because I thought I was too fat to wear a bikini), but because I thought it was more classy, more holy, more good.

As I was approaching my 30th birthday, I had planned this trip to Cozumel, Mexico and there was just this gut desire to wear a bikini.

This desire that I couldn’t shake.

Okay, I’m wearing a bikini for my 30th birthday!” I boldly announce to my sister and a good friend.

But that wasn’t the entire battle, it was finding one that fit (this girl has big breasts— and she needed to find a bikini top that kept them in place. Who wants to be the girl with her chest busting out of the top? Not me).

I did find one.

And I wore it proudly in the ocean while snuba diving, snorkeling, and paddle boarding.

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It was the most liberating experience, and I remember the following thoughts hit me like bricks…

This is not a big deal.
“No one cares.”
“It’s so cool to be free to be me.
Wow. Your body is amazing. You are amazing.”

Sometimes, body shame is wrapped in a rule that was given to us by well-intentioned parents.

And sometimes, it’s a belief picked up from an institution that you chose to adopt for yourself.

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Never be afraid to ask questions.
 Or to listen to your desires.

Love & grace,
Melodee

p.s.
 What’s something that you used to believe, but now you don’t? It’s always a delight to hear and learn from you. xo

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